Monday, March 1, 2010

This is what writer's block looks like. It looks like fear. Irritation. Self-consciousness and a feeling of blankness. Feeling like one's ideas are lacking in some crucial way.

But through the help of my spiritual coach/therapist/cheerleader I am choosing to believe in the power of my creative gifts. To lean into them, to live into my most grandiose dreams one day- and one sentence- at a time. There is a part of me that feels so very damaged around my creativity and in such typical ways. I have gotten past the point of thinking in terms of being a "great writer", a "gifted painter", a great anything actually. All I really want is to grow my skills, to not completely waste what gifts I have been blessed with.

I have been absent here for days because of these fears. Fears of failing before I begin, fears of having nothing to say, having no audience, boring whoever does stumble into my small part of cyberspace.

That said, I am Leo, hear me roar. I have an inborn stubbornness that refuses to give in to complete pessimism and despair. I have, somewhere inside of me, the will and ego to believe that I have something to say and that what I do matters. To take these baby steps towards the life I wish to be living. And it is getting closer every day.

1 comment:

  1. I hear you on the writer's block. Let me share with you this quote from Stephen King:
    Stephen King, author of forty-seven novels and ninety-six short stories, on how he stays productive: "I go to the same place to write almost every day. I don't bring a cell phone. I don't take an iPod. My mind is thrown on its own resources. I make a little deal with myself. I say, just get five pages out. Five pages, and that's it. You're done. Of course I'll get to five pages and always want to write a little bit more, but without that quota, I'd have a hard time even starting.